Breastfeeding and nursing and pumping are all discussed in this post. Not in a gross way. This is your warning – feel free to not comment (mom & dad) about how you can’t believe I wrote a whole post about this AND posted pictures.
* * *
Tank is now 10 months old. I can’t believe it’s gone so fast. I know I’ve said this like every single month, but I could just freeze him at this age and it would be fabulous.
One thing that makes me sad is thinking about the end of breastfeeding. I love nursing my baby. I love that I have the ultimate pacifier when he’s upset. I love it when he gives me 5 as he’s nursing (see the third picture below). I love how he’ll nurse for a few minutes, and then sit up (which involves removing the nursing cover if we’re out…it’s pretty fun to scramble to make sure I’m not totally exposed) and see what he’s missing out on, and then he’ll get back into position for more.
I didn’t make it this far with Mallory. The stress of keeping up my supply was killing my supply and she was on all formula by the time she was 9 months. Hopefully she won’t hold it against me.
Anyway, in anticipation (or rather un-anticipation) of the end of my breastfeeding days – which hopefully won’t be for another two months – I wanted Rick to take some pictures of me, for me. I’ve spent so much time the past 10 months and one day in this position, I want to be able to remember it forever. It’s so easy now but it was so hard in the beginning. I remember when Carson turned 5 months; I told Rick that I was DONE. DONE DONE DONE. He asked how long I nursed Mallory, and I quickly answered “4.5 months”, thinking that he’d support me more if he thought I’d gotten farther than I did with Mallory. For once his memory worked and he called me on it.
I’m glad I didn’t give up. I’m glad I didn’t give up at one week, when it hurt so freaking much I thought I was going to die. I’m glad I didn’t give up when Carson turned 5 months and it would have been so much more fun to tailgate properly, and not have to worry about not drinking too much because I was still nursing. I’m glad I didn’t give up when he was 7.5 months and we were both sick over Thanksgiving and that little trucker BIT me for the first time.
It’s been a lot of work – pumping in the car on the way to work, pumping three times during the day at work, and pumping before bed.
But looking at these pictures, I’m proud of all of my hard work. I’m proud of me.
This post is not meant to offend anyone who didn’t nurse and/or pump. It’s my journal and I want to record my memories about breastfeeding my baby.
I read it anyway.
That is a wonderful memory. I only breastfed Tracy for 2 months and Stef not at all (too shy). Congratulations for hanging in there.
Good for you, that’s amazing. And a special bond you’ll have forever :-)