I am doing the Couch to 5k running program again this spring. I don’t have any races on my calendar but I have this crazy idea that I might want to do the Disney Princess Half Marathon next February (how else can I convince Rick to take us to Florida in February?). I am not crazy enough to think that I can actually run 13.1 miles, but I do think I can walk/run/jog 13.1 miles in under 3.25 hours so I might try it out.
Today was week 7, day 3 of the program. I had a 5 minute warm-up walk, then I had to run for 22 minutes, walk one, run one, and then a 5 minute cool down. My doctor prescribed me an inhaler last fall when I had my annual bronchitis spell; he thinks I have some kind of asthma and suggested I use an inhaler before I exercise. I hadn’t really used it until about six weeks ago and OMG it’s a million times easier to run when I don’t feel like my lungs are on fire!
So back to today’s workout. The longest I’ve run before today was 20 minutes, so I was nervous about the 22 minute section.
I started running. Here’s what happened:
| 22 minutes to go | There is no way I can run 22 minutes. |
| 21 minutes to go | Phew…one minute down. |
| 20 minutes to go | Phew…two minutes down. I’m 1/11 of the way done! |
| 19 minutes to go | Ugh. It’s hard to fast forward through commercials when I’m running. |
| 18 minutes to go | I’ve already done four minutes! Go me. |
| 17 minutes to go | I wonder if anyone is awake upstairs. |
| 16 minutes to go | Dang – do I have a huge booger in my nose? Can I really run another 16 minutes with a booger in my nose? |
| 15 minutes to go | Will the kids know I’m downstairs if they wake up? Will Rick be able to hear Carson yelling that he has to go potty? I should probably stop running and go make sure all is ok upstairs. |
| 14 minutes to go | No. Keep running. |
| 13 minutes to go | That booger is driving me crazy! I have to get a kleenex. *PAUSE TREADMILL AND RUNNING APP* Get kleenex and clean my nose. Start running again. |
| 12 minutes to go | Almost halfway done! I really need to get some real running gear. I used to think all the special clothes are dumb but I’m realizing that my ideal running outfit would be sleeveless and tight under my armpits to stop sweat from running down my arms, but also wouldn’t cover my stomach. Since I don’t know if they sell stuff like that, I’ll keep rolling up my sleeves to my shoulders, and tucking the bottom of my shirt up over the neck. |
| 11 minutes to go | ROCK ON WITH MY BAD SELF! I am halfway done. |
| 10 minutes to go | I really hate running. I hate hate hate it. I need a drink of water (step off sides of running belt for 10 seconds and take a drink). |
| 9 minutes to go | I wonder if the kids’ soccer games are going to be cancelled? Please? |
| 8 minutes to go | I turn off the TV and start listening to music on my iPhone instead. I need to make a better running playlist so I don’t have to scroll through stuff I don’t like to find stuff I do like. |
| 7 minutes to go | 2/3 of the way done!! Hooray! At this point I realize that my head wants to quit more than my lungs or my legs. I force my head to keep going. |
| 6 minutes to go | Mallory came into the basement and scared me and almost made me fall off the treadmill. |
| 5 minutes to go | FIVE MORE MINUTES! I remember when running just five minutes was sooooo long and look at me now! |
| 4 minutes to go | My head is trying to tell my legs to be tired so I can stop. Who the hell needs to run this long anyway? I can do the half marathon with a combo walk-run. Why try to kill myself? |
| 3 minutes to go | Club Can’t Handle Me by Flo Rida comes on. I can visualize Hines Ward dancing on Dancing with the Stars. I got this. |
| 2 minutes to go | Holy &%#$ I am almost done! |
| 1 minute to go | I am going to die. WHY AM I RUNNING? I HATE RUNNING. |
| one minute walk | Phew…I can catch my breath. Then I have to run for another minute? |
| one minute run | Maybe I don’t want to do a half-marathon |
| five minute cool down | I can’t wait to tell Rick that I just ran 22 minutes straight (well, except for that quick booger break)! |
I think part of the problem is that I’m learning that just because I did this 22 minute straight run, it’s not the end. In two days I have to run 25 minutes straight. And after that 30 minutes straight. It still isn’t fun but a little teeny tiny part of me is getting a teeny tiny bit competitive and I want to be able to do this.
So I may still do that half-marathon, but Rick better not get any crazy ideas that I might want to do a full marathon or triathlon.
You need to learn the runner trick of closing one nostril and blowing the boogers out. Come on, it isn’t like a booger is going to be the grossest thing to hit your basement floor.
Do a triathlon.
And Colleen is right, if you can run 22 minutes straight you can certainly shoot a snot-rocket.